This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
