these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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