but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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