Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
