Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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