Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize