Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize