those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Randomize