There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
