This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
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