I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Randomize
