Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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