How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I just saw a hot homeless man
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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