dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Ladies don't puke and tell
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
