why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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