Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
