i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
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