That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Randomize
