I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
