It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
two words...techno handjob
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
