You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
