I can text with my tongue
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Randomize