It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
