so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
