Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
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