Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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