i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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