Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize