North Korea, Best Korea!
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Randomize
