You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Randomize
