i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
last night I used snow as a chaser
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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