Dual....:-)
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Randomize
