you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Randomize
