ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
