She said her name was "party"
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
