It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize