Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Randomize
