so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
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