was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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