if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Randomize