He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
