someone threw a dead crab at me
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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