You work out of a Hotel?
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
