I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
