5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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