I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Randomize
