dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
