Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Randomize
