Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
