I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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