Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
