I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
